Figure 1.--This French postcard illustrates what the Frech at the time would have referred to as "Garçons Modèles". This boy wears a blouse with puff sleeves, a popular style for a younger boy in France. A French reader reports, "This image is showing exactly the look of a " un petit garçon modèle " . His hair has a right part, his ingenous look, puffed sleeves, and flowers in his hand are perfect. Of course he is wearing short pants." We had thought the card, which is postally unusd dated from the 1920s. Our French reader tells us that the 1930s or even the 40s. Yhe collar is not shown which would have been gelpful in dating it. French boys even in the early-50s were wearing these fancy blouses for the petits garçons modèles look. Image courtesy of the MD collection.

French garçons modèles were not only well dressed, but they were also very well behaved. A French reader who lived for a time in Austria tells us about the rules of poliness used by the enfants modèles or by the children of the high society ( bonne socièté ). He tells us, "For the posterity I will speak about the good manners concerning the children from good families during the 1950s. It seems that is unknown by the new generation. In the 1950s when I grew up there were unwritten rules for children that they were none-the-less obliged to respect. The same was true in Austria where I lived for a time. Today all this is changed. Children today are treated like little kings. In 1950s they was a world for children and a world for adults and it was not possible to mix them. It is true also that the children had no on many topics, often including the selection of their clothes." The tree principal groups of rules were: 1) the child's behavior with the members of his family (at home); 2) the child's behavior with the persons outside his family or visiting friends and realtives; 3) the child's behavior at school for general teaching, music, or other activities. Special manners were not needed while playing with other children, except not to use swear words and not to fight. In Austria, as in France, there were variations and there were differences for boys and girls.

Chronology

Our French reader tells us how he grew up in the 1940s anf 50s with these rules. He tell us, however, that in modern France that they are largely forgotten. "I know these rules well. Sadly some seem completly forgotten today. When I was explaining to my grandchildren how a girl or a boy shoud do in different circumstances, they are rather surprised. My son-in-low is laughing."

Gender

There were very distinct rules for boys and girls. In a general way, these rules were a bit more difficult to learn for the girls than for boys.

Groups of Rules

The tree principal groups of rules were: 1) the child's behavior with the members of his family (at home); 2) the child's behavior with the persons outside his family or visiting friends and realtives; 3) the child's behavior at school for general teaching, music, or other activities. Special manners were not needed while playing with other children, except not to use swear words and not to fight.

Family members/home behavior

In the morning, children were not permitted to come into the living room wearing their pajamas. We were obliged to dress first. In contrast, in the evening it was permit to stay with our Parents dressed in pajamas. A French reader provides some interesting information about the childre were addressed, "In earlier years a familiar and kind word was used to tell a child: ' Ma poule ' (my hen in English). This term was used principaly by the popular circle and it is rarely used today. In bourgeoisy or educated circle one used and uses always the words: ' mon trésor ' ( for both ) or ' ma chèrie ' ( for a girl ) mon chéri ( for a boy ). My family members ( except my Father ) used both words to call my brother, sister, and myself . It was practicly the constant term used by my Uncle and Granmother and the word " ma poule " should have been a bit deplaced. To day myself I call my children ' chéri ' "

Visitors

A boy saying " hello" to an adult person encoutered on the street, should do so in the following sequence: He should remove his beret, but not a sailor hat, sun hat. or other types of headwears. He was taught to look the person in the face and quickly do little move of his head and at the same time say "Bonjour Monsieur", "Bonjour Madame", ect. We did't say Mademoiselle to a girl, instead we used the Christian name or nothing. An educated adult, would not shake the hand or touch the child. Only an important or elderly person could slightly touch the cheek. Inside the house, or in the street if the child was accompanied by an adult, it was a bit different. The person that they would meet, would first greet the child's parent or guardian. The child had to wait for the adult to next greet them before answeting.

There were special rules for girls and boys. About the greeting by the girls more than 6 years old. They were changing according the place. In the home, a girl had the permission to greet any guests that came to the house first. She could greet all the guests (old, young, boy, or girl) first. Very often, when someone knocked, the youngest girl on the family (of course not infants) would rush right to the door. It was considered as part of her education, to learn how to greet people. She was taught to face an adult visitor, place her right foot a bit behind; and place her arms along her body. She then gracefully opened her hands and made a quick very slight genuflexion rather like a cutsey. They were taught that this genuflextion might be done with the art of the body going rather in the left. This way of greeting was compulsory in many circumstances for the girls in Austria more than in France. After the girl greeted the visitors, she was then taught to follow the same basic rules as those of boys and older girls. Young boys less 12-14 years old, were not expected to greet or speak first. They were expected to politely wait. To do otherwise was considered very ill-manered.

About saying thank you, the rules were the same for both boys and girls. A child might add at the " Merci " always the denomination of the person ( it was strict compulsory ): Merci maman, Merci Monsieur, Merci Christopher, but never Mademoiselle.

Familiarities

A French reader tells us, "In France we kiss much and often our children and it is fun because imitating people make us alike within the family. Only an important person, no belowing to the child'sfamily can kiss a child. To day this rule is still recpected."

School

There were rules for school behavior which are now not commonly followed in Austria and France. A group like a must stand silently without moving the arms along the body for greeting an older person. A child must never speak out in class without permission. He must signal his intention by holding his hand up or he must stay one meter distance facing the person and wait. A teacher or a subordinat couldn't adress the child as " tu ". When a person was scolling a child, the child had to stand without moving and lower his head in contrition. An answer must end by the title of the person ( merci maman; oui madame ; non maitresse ect... ). These rules might be used by all children ; the were anothers specific ones for enfants modèles a bit more complicated .

Other children

Special manners were not needed while playing with other children, when playing or at school, except not to use swear words and not to fight. Of course with visitors or on special occassions such as parties or formal events like weddings, more formal manners were expected. These varied somewhat deppending on the child's age and fender.

Training

Children were taught the rules at a very young age. Our French reader commoents, "I am sure all this sounds a bit complicated to HBC readers. In reality it was easily taught. We absolutely didn't find it difficult to learn these lessons as children. In fact, we thought it was quite natural."

Age

The rules changed with the age of the child.

Austria and France

All the Austrian children respected these rules, probably they were getting strictly enforce as other aspects of the NAZI regime. [HBC tends to believe this more part of Germanic national character than NAZI influence on the family.] In France it was less complicated and the adult contacts with the children were more tender. In France we kiss often the children and the family gives them constant cuddles." A French reader tells us about trends in manners, "In France and in Austria " bonnes manières " were practically the same, perhaps even more often used inside the standard family than in France. Probably these rules were also used in others European countries as well.

Traditions

Our French reader tells us, "A large part of this education style comes from past traditions. My granmother was very attentive to manners and teaching the children. My parents were not really that concerned and me not at all. The modern society doesn't permit such manners to be easily taught. Now the small child in France is rather considered as a little king. In past generations a child under 5 years was not included in many family activities. He was treated like a baby without a personality an almost hiden. Myself I think babies and children should be given all the family attention they need."

Comments

A French reader writes, "What an informative page. It is fascinating to find all these insights about the French " enfants modèles "on an American website. Although these manners were well known not only in educated families, there were also followed in the average French family. In the mid-20th century the manners of petits garçons modèles were widespread in France. It's true a bit later one can still see such boys but they have lost a big part of the good manners." HBC is an American site in the sense of the site is maintained in America. We have, however, readers and contributers on every continent (except Antartica) and look on our site as an international site. By sharing experiences, HBC readers can learn about childhood not only in their own country, but other countries as well.

Another French reader writes, "I recall these principal rules quite clearly. I also recall the atmosphere. Perhaps it was a bit heavy for us. And of course I was very closely supervised as I had a Ninera was was never far from me. This was different from my sister and brother who were raised at home. They were allowed to play on the streeet which I was never allowed as a little boy. I never recall hearing rude words as a little boy. I regret nothing because the strongest memories I have as a little boy was of being protected and loved and that is essential for a child."